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27 June 2007

Cunning Linguists Turn Me On

Today we’re going to talk about oral sex. So, if you’re under eighteen, or at work, it’s recommended you close this window immediately and go do something else. My archives have some nice wholesome material somewhere, if you’re interested.

A friend who shall remain nameless—although she knows who she is and she’s welcome to come out and admit it—was once being given “sex ed” classes by her older sister, who shall also remain nameless (hello, out there). “Do you know what oral sex is?” her sister asked. “Yes!” said my friend, much to the amazement of her older sister, who laboured under the impression that this friend was most innocent and untouched by the Things Adults Did. “What is it then?” she asked. “Oral sex,” said my friend confidently, “Is when two people take off their clothes and talk about sex.” Right.

I can’t say much about going down on a woman, seeing as I’ve never done that, but it’s fairly simple to pleasure someone of my gender. Simply have an agile and dexterous tongue (mmmmmm) and wandering light fingers and, um, lots of energy. Lots and lots of energy. There’s this bit in Deep Throat (not that I’ve seen it, but I’ve seen this quotation somewhere and loved it) where the woman goes, “Do you mind if I smoke while you eat?” By the way, I’ve done that, and it’s awesome. You totally should as well. There’s something so decadent about lying there, sprawled on your back, preferably with your top on, because you don’t want live ashes spilt all over the rather *ahem* delicate areas of your body, doing French inhales and watching the top of someone’s head. Preferably someone you love, but someone who gets your panties in a twist totally works as well.

Why are men so obsessed by the blow job? Besides the fact that it combines two things they love the most—sex and sitting on their asses doing nothing—I think it’s also a power trip for them. As it is for you, I suppose, but men get this big kick out of watching you turn your attentions to Junior down there. Some men get carried away though. You know what I hate? Men who insist on controlling your head. There are some who will move your head up and down, and worse, others who will speed up the motions of their hips, until you’re practically gagging. And then they complain you’re using your teeth. For the love of god, until you decided to rape my mouth, I was doing perfectly fine.

I guess it’s a power trip for women as well, giving a blow job. You have him right where you want him, and if you want to just hear that he loves you, or he needs you, or you’re so fucking hot, even if in your heart of hearts you know he doesn’t mean it, this is a good time to make that request. Everything I needed to know about giving good head I learnt from Cosmo. Of course, each man is different, blah blah blah, but there are a certain set of rules which applies to most men I find. The quick-inhalation factor, if you're with a quiet guy, the ohhhhhhh factor if you're with a moaner, and best of all, if you're with a talker, the oh-fuck-yes factor. Those are fun. Power trip, yes, totally. But scoff all you like, Cosmo and that online woman's magazine thing ivillage gave me a lot of handy household hints. One article in ivillage was called How To Love Like A Geisha and while I remember very little of it, one tip was to use your hands and tongue in opposite directions, as in, one clockwise and one anti-clockwise. It may sound complicated, but once you've perfected it, it works like a charm.

I believe men's magazines don't offer the same service, which I think is weird. They do have articles about sex, right? So, I'm assuming the presumption they're working on is that men either a) need no help at all on their game b) do not want to provide any reciprocal pleasure to their women or c) don't read magazines to get sex tips. But then, don't you guys sit around and discuss what turns the opposite sex on the way we do? (And when I say we, I mean my friends and I, when we're working on a third bottle of wine and reduced to giggles. But I'm sure other groups of girls do as well) And if you don't ever dicuss the dirty with your friends, how do men know what to do in bed? Porn? And if that's true, I'm sure all the men I've been with have been very disappointed.

While we're in the Things That Leave Me Mystified department, what's with the obsession about swallowing? I did a fair amount of research for this post; ie, I asked people I knew about their views on blow jobs; and when I got to the swallowing, all the men got this glazed, happy look on their faces. Ahhh, swallowing, I'm sure their minds went, that's good shit, dude. I personally don't get it. I'm a spitter myself, as are lots of women I know, and in a conversation with Hobo recently, I told her about this post and she said, "You should write that men should avoid asparagus if they want a blow job." Yes, coz semen? Has different tastes. If you've eaten spicy food, it tingles on the back of your tongue. Sometimes, most of the time, it's bitter, but the best, says Hobo, is when you eat strawberries or pineapple. Gentlemen, I hope you're paying attention here. Hobo also told me about "snowballing", where this friend of hers got a mouthful without warning, so holding it in her mouth she crawled upwards to kiss the guy and deposited in his mouth. ALWAYS GIVE WARNING. I cannot say this enough. Once, after I spat, the boyfriend then was sitting with such a smug expression on his face that I grabbed him and tongued him. I'm sure he'll never look that smug again.

Although blow jobs are a heck of a lot of work. And effort. And time. And usually the guy is so spent after you're done with him that he has no time for you. My friends and I only pull out the oral if we really like someone. So, if assuming you've slept with five guys, only two get the royal treatment.

I'm putting in two polls here, one for the men and one for the women. The male one is basically to establish what another ex of mine told me--there is no such thing as a bad blow job. True or false? Weigh in. The one for the chicas is to determine what kind of liberated twentyfirst century men we're dealing with. Did your last or present hook up go down on you?

In case the polls don't appear properly, as they're doing on my machine, here are the links where you can take them online. Boys and girls.

I'm sure this post will generate a fair amount of namecalling, but try and keep an open mind. Hey, at least I'm not getting knocked up, right?




72 comments:

  1. your poll doesn't cover my opinion - which is that I hate oral sex. will give for love, but hate it. men should only ask for it after they've been made to do it - not to women btu another man so they know what it is like.

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  2. Seeing that line about asparagus reminded me of this...

    First time commenter and long time reader here, btw. Shall lurk around as usual :D

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  3. I would dearly love to leave a name but the woman in my life would kill me. Not for leaving a name but for my comment bcuz I'm certain she reads your blog too.

    Men would rather receive head than give it.
    Men will, grudgingly, give head to receive it but will do it as an obligation.
    Very few guys can give good head and I've given enough tips to earn the ever loving praise of Eros.
    Even fewer want to get nasty and dirty, their fingers, their tongue, their lips and variations of texture and pressure and angle. But there is a huge power trip for guys as well. To see her on the edge and not take her over. Gets me everytime.
    eM, G-Spot play? Don't tell me you've never. If you haven't you must. She's gonna blow! Tha' she blows!
    As for snowballing, fuck me straight, there are guys who'd refuse to lip-lock after the deed? What simian creatures do you date? If it's good enough for you, it's good enough for them. Do you not lip-lock after they've rag-munched?
    And men do get tips. Google is your guide.

    Like this and this and this and this

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  4. A good tutorial.
    Frankly speaking the willingness to give head depends on the individual.
    As a guy I sometimes feel it necessary for the girl to feel pleasant and giving head is what I feel the best way to. I have heard it's better than the actual thing, but no idea on that. You would be knowing it better.

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  5. another adult education class.
    Thaaankk you Teacherrrr

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  6. i have to say
    i've really enjoyed this post. it was very giggle worthy.

    i'm also really quite curious about blowjobs

    i've never performed one to date. it seems like fun. cant be much harder than a woman can it?

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  7. WTF? You are wayyyyyyy too frank. I saw one of your "uncles" reading your blog the other day. What if he decides to rat on you?! Sambhal kar rani.

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  8. great as usual ...hilarious..educative...instructie..clockwise anticlockwise...i m under 21 ...no exp..
    do they give any booker/nobel kind of award to blogs..

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  9. lil eM.. your filmmaker friend from Delhi. Your worst post to date. ridiculous... what is this?!?!?! I mean.. its... i donno what to say.. it sucks!! No wait.. it swallows!!!

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  10. tb: actually the poll was made for only those questions, but yes, i know what you mean. although, i think it's rather fun, just the way some men choose not to go down, women should stop feeling guilty and do the same thing. oh, and welcome back! :)

    anantha: thanks for the link! now THAT was educational. heh.

    anon1: g spot play on men? really? and ha ha, no, the men i date are (for the most part) fairly enlightened or too scared of me not to kiss me, but there are strange creatures in this world. and thank YOU also for the links. :)

    tetracyclops: if by the "actual thing" you mean sex, then well. it's debatable.

    bricks: next week, condoms! (no, i jest, relax)

    moonstruck: one assumes you mean that in a good way, so thank you.

    scritch: it's waaaaaaay easier. for one thing, men are turned on by even the SIGHT of a nipple, for another there aren't any fiddly bits, just what you see is what you get etc. being with a woman sounds much tougher.

    king: frankness is relative, surely. (heh. i crack myself up. hello, uncle!)

    anon2: not as far as i know but awwww, thank you. :)

    ff: you're just jealous. :P

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  11. That question about where men learn? The best way is to ask a woman. Or women. Hands-on approach.

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  12. :) it's about the passion of the moment really. i've never really thought about recently 'cos the days of random hook ups are some time away..back then it was highly dependant (both ways) on the level of alcohol consumed...

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  13. Ooooh! I loved this post, even if I hate oral sex. I didn't realise it was such a long post till I had reached the end of it without realising it was so long!

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  14. In my defence, I was eleven!!

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  15. quite an insightful one this post of yours... but personally for a virgin like i really can't say much on this.. so i guess i'll stnad at the sidelines and watch teh show!!

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  16. oh btw, men do discuss.... right from teh first move to the last move!!

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  17. i sent ur blog link to a female friend of mine and her comment was "this girl writes directly into your face".

    as for the debate, i have no clue.. am like a kid who wandered into a topless bar.

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  18. Yes eM, it was. Somehow it is difficult for men to write on topics like these and they are mostly crass in humour; women somehow do a good job keeping the fun fresh.
    I just couldn't get over the snowballing part though because a similar thing happened with a friend of mine. And I couldn't get over it back then too.

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  19. He He!
    Imagine Mr.president impeached because he took his clothes off and talked dirty. What was the cigar used for. If it wasn't burnt, why has it become a souvenir? Thanks to the media which "blew" the clinton scandal out of proportion, it saved a few blushes in the world as far as oral sex is concerned. ;)
    as for us men not having a male-equivalent of cosmo, your blog could do the trick, em !
    cheers!

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  20. Loved the post...well written, brutally honest in some ways and fair in most ways.

    A job well done. Now am really looking forward to your book!

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  21. :) well, considering I give and receive head to/on the same organ ... lemme tell u, bad blowjobs do exist and even worse are bad organs [giggles]

    and as a hater of semen, I think snowballing is so ewuuu :)

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  22. as on a prior occasion (for a national daily) i believe i have been grossly misquoted.

    1. no rocket science here i don't think anyone fancies giving head.

    2. i said 'our flavours' whether you're male or female are affected by the diet we maintain. people who feast on asparagus, garlic etc. will have bitter tasting personal juices, even their sweat stinks worse whereas my french friends tell me pineapples and strawberries are fruits for all seasons.

    3. i believe terming oral sex as an investment and snowballing as punishment.

    4. semen has a very high vitamin e content and in some cultures is used for treating minor problems as acne. unless they have a steady diet of aspargus in those cultures.......

    5. why do i know any of this? sigh......i don't know why. i think i had a filter in my brain that snapped many many many moons ago.

    6. thanks for the harmless misquote.

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  23. Have you heard of the 'Lick and Flick' routine. You lick, and if he leaks .. you flick. Ouch

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  24. Hahaha...loved it - FINALLY it was good to see someone who was frank enough to talk about these things.

    My guy is wonderfully caring in that before he was about to explode would pull away so I wouldn't be faced with that choice. When I insisted myself, he was half-ecstatic, half-apprehensive like OMG what is she going to do - and well...I think I'm a spitter too :P

    You give only as good as you get - what about those who completely refuse to give it back?? Selfish bastards lol.

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  25. Hey eM,
    Super post!!happy birthday to the blog :-)I'm a devoted (female) reader of your blog;we're about the same age and I've trawled through ur archives loads of times and completely identify with most of the stuff you write(sounds corny?)I'm truly grateful for all the times that I've found your experiences so comforting *wish we were real friends* sigh!
    anyway,coming back to this post,more power to you for putting it down so bloody 'exactly'..yes,what the boys eat does affect the taste of their semen..but not too much,I've always found it to be bitter/salty and it leaves a slight stinging sensation on the tongue.Cant say I'm a fan of the taste but yes,the guys fucking love it if you swallow and its a fantasy for most of them (the ones I've been with at least)because of the precise reason that most girls are 'spitters'..you swallow,you rule them...and guys,its true,please dont hold our heads while we're going down you..please?we'd like to feel that we're in the position of 'power' and the head-holding just kills it.and as a request,if you like oral action,please keep your bits shaved..trimmed at least!
    That said,thanks again for the post eM..now I'm waiting eagerly for a post on the other 'unexplored' area..the backdoor!sadly,cosmo stays away from this and most folks seem to be inexperienced in this regard..
    you go sistah!

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  26. this reads like a scrapbook of teenagers who've just discovered sex.. and like all generations do...they too think. they're the first!!!
    And people.. you cant get better by reading.. its like learning to dribble (soccer) by reading a book.. doesnt happen.. you either have the magic in your feet or you dont... you cant be tutored...

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  27. From what I have heard, male cunning linguists don't spit. They either put their nose down willingly or don't. Or maybe my circle of knowledge is small...

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  28. hey eM,
    this is quite a topic youve picked...
    well, i actually have to agree with most of it, for most guys its a power trip as it is for the ladies as well..
    in my experience, the only way to really learn is to ask the girls themselves. when i had no idea what i was doing, i just used to tell them i wanted to do right by them (and i did want to) and asked them to sort of.. guide me along... makes a world of a difference!
    personally I think its a choice matter. i myself quite like the idea of goin down on a girl, simply cos if my parter isnt enjoying herself, i dont.. its a kind of fetish with me (for lack of a better word)
    most girls i know dont really care for bj's, but that doesnt really phase me.. you like me enough and are willing to do so in the course of things, cool, i dont much like to ask - better when the moment flows of its own accord..
    but thats just me.
    anyhow, nice post, informative and fun. thanks again madame...
    cheers..

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  29. hats off...but taking the hat off will expose the "head" ...very well articulated!

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  30. Public display of satisfaction ;)... was it ??

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  31. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  32. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  33. Hi eM,

    Thank you for being so brutally honest. It is a refreshing change from the hypocrisy that one normally encounters in our part of the world. I really do enjoy your posts very much.

    For the record, I'm a woman, and thankfully the man in my life is considerate enough to let me know when he is about to get close to his O. So I'm spared the spitting/swallowing business, which I clearly do not enjoy. And yes, he returns the favour too. But I have no qualms about making him, umm, happy this way. It isn't like it's an ordeal or anything. But I've learnt that with time, the power play and dominance in sex fades out, and unhurried, intimate, less kinky sex tends to become the norm. Which, from experience I can tell is a lot of funner and happier in a very different way. Plus I guess you tend to get lazy with time too. :)

    But hell, the entire blowjob thing, is so totally subject to an individual's preferences. It'd be interesting to see what sort of data your poll comes up with.

    Though, for all you men/women who want to get your technique right, grab that illustrated Kamasutra doing the rounds online, you might find it helpful.

    eM, I'm going to sound like a boring old woman now. But you should allow me that. My advice to you - don't be promiscuous. It'll get tiring after a point. Unless you want to become the next female hugh hef. :) And please have safe sex.

    Also, There are going to be a number of people(including me) who'll offer you a moral discourse on this one. Please tell them all to go take a hike.

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  34. I gotta say - I am a woman, and I love giving head. Not the power play part of it, but the actual physical part of it. I think it's fascinating and very satisfying to see your partner enjoy himself so much. And since I am so sincere about it, most men I have been with recognize that and willingly do the same for me. I'm surprised to see so many people unhappy with oral. It should be the funnest part of foreplay.

    Open your mind too people, not just your mouth!

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  35. Hey eM,
    Awesome post. I have been reading your blog for a while now but i seldom comment. But this topic i totally identify with. My boyfriend and I enjoy a healthy relationship both spiritually and physically. Physically we are experimental in more ways than one. Going down on each other never came easy not for me and not for my guy. But once we learnt how much more fun it is, it's become more regular than intercourse. I somehow feel we Indian girls are more reluctant to indulge in Oral Sex and its better we stay that way because Indian men are not known to have the cleanest genitals. Besides unlike a few in India and most in the western countries, a lot of our boys aren't circumcised. I have done both and trust me, circumcised seems fresh out of the box. Also i trust who i am with and usually would practice the withdrawl method. The feeling of bare skin cannot be replaced by any elastic, dotted or ribbed. Maybe the new vibratory kind will have something new to offer. All i said above is true but at any time did it occur to you that i might be a guy.
    fuck the anonymous world

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  36. First time here ! And loving it..!!!
    Cunning linguist. And SOME turn on !!

    Lovely !

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  37. Gutsy girl. Don't let trolls keep you down. Lack of sex does strange things to people.

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  38. Coming from an Indian woman - a gutsy post indeed. And very frank too.

    You have quite a following - in the real world as well ;-)

    Cheers

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  39. Best.Post.Ever

    And Hobo, thanks muchly for the diet tips.

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  40. im not sure if this whole thing of going down by a man or woman being an act done out of coercion is right. a lot of times its hot to do it - the sight and the smells down there and the sounds up there. have felt this for women and have heard the same (from some if not all). i believe quite a few men go down on a woman because it turns them on, and quite a few women do the same on men because it makes them hornier. there is a strong physical and pheromone angle to this too. oh yeah, cleanliness does it.

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  41. my boyfriend has always loved going down on me, but it took me a while to become completely comfortable with it. in a lot of ways, it can be a lot more intimate than intercourse. anyway, with time and an increased comfort level, oral sex has become SO MUCH more pleasurable. i absolutely LOVE it now.

    as for giving blowjobs, the mere THOUGHT used to gross me out entirely. i never gave a "complete"one for a long time because of this, but i've grown to really really love it because it turns on my man which turns ME on greatly too.

    and i swallow. it's just never been a big deal for me, and it makes the boy happy so it works out well :)

    in brief, we're both fans of oral sex!

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  42. Firstly, give yourself a pat on the back. Stay as thickskinned as you can b'coz it may not be long before some protector of indian culture will want to exercise the right to moral policing..

    Ok, coming to the post. A few observations

    -There are bad blowjobs. Without a doubt.

    -I think hygiene is important. Very very important. Over-emphasize its importance. Please.

    -You cannot learn this stuff by reading some thesis or research papers or iVillage. You either have it or you don't. Most people take their persona with them at work or at play. So in a small way, you can predict before action the difference between the courteous and caring folks and the i-belong-to-the-center-of-the-earth folks! It tastes a lot better if you care about your partner and are interested in making him/her happy. Giving good head is all in the head (The part of the anatomy that lies on top. On top of the neck)

    -There are no A-Z rules. Everyone is different. What works for one may not work for another. Speak. Ask. Communication is the key.

    - Finally, its one act thats not about you. Remembering that is very important.

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  43. Did you hear that? It sounded like ten thousand teenage desi blog-voyeurs jerking off on their keyboards.

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  44. okaayy. i guess im still a bit of a kid, coz this post made me a bit uncomfortable. but i liked the points of education as well.

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  45. you couldn't get me more interested ;)

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  46. truly disappointed with this post eM. i hope all the sense is flowing towards your book, so i can understand such an unimpressive post

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  47. reads like somebody very desperately trying to be the paris hilton of indian blogospehere or the next generation shobha de.

    eM, does your book have more like this? because then, i will not buy it.

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  48. In a post like this one, what's more interesting are the reactions and comments from your Indian readers. And therefore, it may be ok to let some of the more offensive reactions to stay on as well.

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  49. http://www.inthenews.co.uk/news/health/oral-sex-linked-throat-cancer-$1083709.htm

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  50. My favourite technique with women is to grab them by the head and smash their faces into a brick wall repeatedly.

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  51. hmm.. sorry sweety, i think your post is kinda wannabe. someone here compared this to a teenage fuck-post. don't know if you're trying to turn into certain famous sex-bloggers (who are really much much more convincing about carnalities) or up your stats further? or perhaps just experimenting with style and content, in which case - cool, all for it.
    (ouch, here come the defending armies)

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  52. - It might help someone. Request you to leave it posted. -

    12 Questions only you can answer -
    Only you can decide whether you want to give A.A. a try-whether you think it can help you.
    We who are in A.A. came because we finally gave up trying to control our drinking. We still hated to admit that we could never drink safely. Then we heard from other A.A. members that we were sick. (We thought so for years!) We found out that many people suffered from the same feelings of guilt and loneliness and hopelessness that we did. We found out that we had these feelings because we had the disease of alcoholism. We decided to try and face up to what alcohol had done to us. Here are some of the questions we tried to answer honestly. If we answered YES to four or more questions, we were in deep trouble with our drinking. See how you do. Remember, there is no disgrace in facing up to the fact that you have a problem.

    Answer YES or NO to the following questions.

    1. Have you ever decided to stop drinking for a week or so, but only lasted for a couple of days?
    Most of us in A.A. made all kinds of promises to ourselves and to our families. We could not keep them. Then we came to A.A. A.A. said: "Just try not to drink today." (If you do not drink today, you cannot get drunk today.) Yes / No

    2. Do you wish people would mind their own business about your drinking-- stop telling you what to do?
    In A.A. we do not tell anyone to do anything. We just talk about our own drinking, the trouble we got into, and how we stopped. We will be glad to help you, if you want us to. Yes/ No

    3. Have you ever switched from one kind of drink to another in the hope that this would keep you from getting drunk?
    We tried all kinds of ways. We made our drinks weak. Or just drank beer. Or we did not drink cocktails. Or only drank on weekends. You name it, we tried it. But if we drank anything with alcohol in it, we usually got drunk eventually. Yes / No

    4. Have you had to have an eye-opener upon awakening during the past year?
    Do you need a drink to get started, or to stop shaking? This is a pretty sure sign that you are not drinking "socially." Yes / No

    5. Do you envy people who can drink without getting into trouble?
    At one time or another, most of us have wondered why we were not like most people, who really can take it or leave it. Yes / No

    6. Have you had problems connected with drinking during the past year?
    Be honest! Doctors say that if you have a problem with alcohol and keep on drinking, it will get worse -- never better. Eventually, you will die, or end up in an institution for the rest of your life. The only hope is to stop drinking. Yes / No

    7. Has your drinking caused trouble at home?
    Before we came into A.A., most of us said that it was the people or problems at home that made us drink. We could not see that our drinking just made everything worse. It never solved problems anywhere or anytime. Yes / No

    8. Do you ever try to get "extra" drinks at a party because you do not get enough?
    Most of us used to have a "few" before we started out if we thought it was going to be that kind of party. And if drinks were not served fast enough, we would go some place else to get more. Yes / No

    9. Do you tell yourself you can stop drinking any time you want to, even though you keep getting drunk when you don't mean to?
    Many of us kidded ourselves into thinking that we drank because we wanted to. After we came into A.A., we found out that once we started to drink, we couldn't stop. Yes/ No

    10. Have you missed days of work or school because of drinking?
    Many of us admit now that we "called in sick" lots of times when the truth was that we were hung-over or on a drunk. Yes /No

    11. Do you have "blackouts"?
    A "blackout" is when we have been drinking hours or days which we cannot remember. When we came to A.A., we found out that this is a pretty sure sign of alcoholic drinking. Yes/ No

    12. Have you ever felt that your life would be better if you did not drink?
    Many of us started to drink because drinking made life seem better, at least for a while. By the time we got into A.A., we felt trapped. We were drinking to live and living to drink. We were sick and tired of being sick and tired. Yes/ No

    WHAT'S YOUR SCORE?
    Did you answer YES four or more times? If so, you are probably in trouble with alcohol. Why do we say this? Because thousands of people in A.A. have said so for many years. They found out the truth about themselves - the hard way.

    But again, only you can decide whether you think A.A. is for you. Try to keep an open mind on the subject. If the answer is YES, we will be glad to show you how we stopped drinking ourselves..

    A.A. does not promise to solve your life's problems. But we can show you how we are learning to live without drinking "one day at a time." We stay away from that "first drink." If there is no first one, there cannot be a tenth one. And when we got rid of alcohol, we found that life became much more manageable.

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  53. what load of rubbish. couldn't even read through all of it. and you aspire to be a writer?

    p.s. are you shobha de by any chance?

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  54. Thought I'd write something relevant, but with all the other sidetracks the comments have gathered I shall let it be.

    Nice space you have. :)

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  55. And yes, love the title of the post !!! :)

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  56. I used to think that getting head and blowjob is the same thing. Until you have a been a in a relationship for a long time..what used to be a complete blowjob is now just a lil lick here and a lil lick there which is just gettin head. I kiid I kiid.
    69 can be a bit more confusing for the girl and the guy as they dont know whether to concentrate on theirs or keep doing what they were doing. I love it!
    Also spontenous head i.e. in a car, theatre en route to your bed are more exciting.
    Swallowing: if you swallow, its ok..if you dont then atleast let me finish and spit rather than moving out rightbefore I am about to go and leave me hanging is NOT cool!
    neway
    enjoy senora

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  57. Amazing blog. Never ceases to scandalise. Hereby ordained rakhi swant of the blogworld. I cant wait to read Hobo's version of it. Hobo your'e still the best but damn eMs (V)aarigi-anal.

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  58. Just to add my $.02...

    a. I haven't read too many men's sex magazines--but they're mostly about PICTURES! There's little text and pointers and suggestions etc! However, we do gain a fair deal of sexual knowledge from reading girls' magazines! :)

    b. There's no such thing as a bad blowjob. Well, there actually are "bad" blowjobs--but they're better than none at all. And also, the teeth HURT, okay? They really do. And I'm not "raping her mouth" when that happens. (Didn't quite understand that part.)

    c. I wonder what the "smoke and get blown" feeling must be like. Hmmm... Have to try that next time!

    d. The reason why we love the BJ is mostly because it feels DAMNED good. Sure, the power trip factor and all do count, but the bottom line is it feels good. (And yea, we're lazy.)

    e. I find eating a girl out to be almost as pleasurable (okay, not "almost" but somewhere close) as getting blown. Maybe I'm just more of "giver" than the average guy (though I seriously doubt that)!

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  59. my boyfriend would want to do everything (and i mean everything) with me lying on my back doing nothing(role reversal?) including the blowjob. he's the one on top here too and doing the up-down thinggy. its a good thing sometimes..

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  60. As for me i like hand job than blow job. My gurl is very expert in giving me hand job. I am very thankful to parachute company...as we are using thier oil for all sex stuffs.

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  61. gals & guys, sex in all forms is just to enjoy & with each of your comfort level. It depends on the couple involved and should be left to them as long as they practice safe sex...oral or otherwise. stop debating...it gets digressed into a cheap sex blog & titillation. Enjoy sex without any guilty feeling. There's just a human perception about its boundary. The fact remains that, its all subjective. Go get it...

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  62. Get a pat on your back gal. The prudish Indian male & female need to be told openly about sex. There's so much of inhibition that we all stop enjoying sex and get into morale issue of the same. Have as much sex with as many people as possible till you do it safely with consent and enjoy the stuff. Happy sex!

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  63. It really turns me on to learn about an Indian female confessing unobtrusively without a fuss and talking her mind out uninhibited. Though, sex is just another natural way in a relationship between two opoosite sex and quite naturally so, I'm curious to learn more about your personal life and your motive behind such writings. Sex should improve a relationship and should augur well for peace of mind with a healthy attitude towards life in general, wherein, you enjoy yourself and stay away from depression both professionally and personally. But the feeling shouldn't confine to that momentary time-zone while indulging in amrous pleasure. Sex should be a means to a happy relationship. I always vote for sex and invite receprocal feelings to know each other better. Good writings always turns me on. Cheers to you dear.

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  64. If you've really not seen that scene from Deep Throat then your description is incredibly spot on!

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  65. sex: male
    age: 1989
    country: germany

    blowjob ... the greatest thing in this world for men.
    do u have an idea how much great that job is? you see the woman who loves, lick and swallowing your cock... slowly, fast ... and the best thing ?? yeah youre right the badest -> deep throat.
    you feel like u where in heaven.
    otherwise to lick a woman, tahts great too, to see your girl explode.

    sorry for my bad english, but i´ve read your article and i want to leave a commment :)

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  66. Answer to the question of swallowing: I think that for most guys it is a power trip. There is no added physical pleasure for a guy. But I think it shows total devotion and love from the girl and that's what probably guys enjoy the most!

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  67. Well I thought this was rather amusing! I am going to check out some more recents posts now!

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