My latest book is The One Who Swam With The Fishes.

"A mesmerizing account of the well-known story of Matsyagandha ... and her transformation from fisherman’s daughter to Satyavati, Santanu’s royal consort and the Mother/Progenitor of the Kuru clan." - Hindustan Times

"Themes of fate, morality and power overlay a subtle and essential feminism to make this lyrical book a must-read. If this is Madhavan’s first book in the Girls from the Mahabharata series, there is much to look forward to in the months to come." - Open Magazine

"A gleeful dollop of Blytonian magic ... Reddy Madhavan is also able to tackle some fairly sensitive subjects such as identity, the love of and karmic ties with parents, adoption, the first sexual encounter, loneliness, and my favourite, feminist rage." - Scroll



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17 August 2004

The Way I Feel Today

Just typed a whole lot and lost it somewhere. And I don't dare type it all over again--- a very weepy post, am at work etc.

I love work. Work keeps me busy. Work keeps me occupied.
I had a "rejuvenating" haircut. My bra-length hair is now no-length hair.
It's only when I'm alone that the problem starts.
So if you see a bawling woman driving, say hi.

PS: Hima and April, thanks for your supportive comments.
PS 2: Would welcome any comments from the men out there about why your sex treats my sex this way.


8 comments:

  1. good for you that you lost the weepy post.. that wouldnt have made you feel any better, believe me..

    so honey, work work and work till you drop and then go out and party, if being alone doesnt work, dont be.. what are family and friends for?

    too simplistic maybe, but, this, too shall pass..

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi!

    Stumbled upon your blog by accident,and liked the one on Delhi- I have just left the city after having stayed there for a year and a half. I loved it!

    Have also gone through two failed relationships,(of which one was a really painful break up- felt just like how you felt)before finding the right person.

    And this is what I have to say- in retrospect I realise I was not a perfect either and, my boyfriend and I were actually very incompatible.Love truly blinds us.And life sometimes gives us chances to make a different choice by making us go through a lot of pain.It's like an exclusion process - it is amazing how life gives us choices and warnings.And,when we fight and choose to hold on to the same choice which is not working out- we might end up in real bad situations.

    So,maybe this is good for you in the long run.You might also be learning new stuff about yourself.

    And trust me there are guys who treat women with a whole of care and trust than we could ever imagine!! Just hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ok well they pretty much have the mushy stuff covered, so I'm just gonna hand you a stiff double shot of whiskey with no chaser, slap you on your back and point out another cute guy with jeans stretched tightly over his very nice looking ass.

    Pick one :

    http://photos1.blogger.com/img/206/1423/320/ass1.jpg

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hima: No more weepy posts, I promise!
    Sunrayz: Thank you for reading and commenting and for your insight. Maybe a year down the line I'll be able to look back on this and realise it's for the best.
    April: Hot men are JUST what I need :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Men are bastards, that's about all I can say about my gender.

    I don't know you that well, nor your ex, but I can say that things sometimes just work out for the better. My wife had to stay married for 19 years to a bad husband and I had to be in a crappy 4 year non-sexual relationship on my side, but if it weren't for the failed relationships, I wouldn't have met my wife.

    Things will improve - men have insecurities and issues that they always like to blame on the better sex, so don't forget that. Stay occupied, seek refuge in the comfort of friends, and just remember that you've given it your all. If it's not good enough for him, well, he ain't good enough for you! Stay strong!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Because most men are are remarkably retarded when it comes to dealing with emotional stuff which most women regard as fairly routine. Men are also, rather less evolved as a whole.They have significantly more hair, remember?
    And hey, there are quite a few nice men out there, trust me.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hmm, this is a late post so I dont know if you would read it. But here goes- firstly, the pain doesnt really ever go till one gets over a person. There are too many gaps between each second for that to ever happen. Sort of smuggles itself between each second, like a thief, so that you might be working and busy on the strokes of the seconds but in between? Anyway- to the real point of all this- it is an equal world! There are bad break ups by women too. The personal is the political- and all that, remember? So, dont blame the gender but the person. I have horror stories of my own to tell. But then, c'est la vie! Rememember nietzsche and what he said about that which doesnot kill you!! Only it wont happen for a while!! Though it looks like you are getting better.
    Cheers

    ReplyDelete
  8. Diego, Aj, Cacofonix, thank you all for your insights. Yes, I am feeling a lot better now.. but there are still hard days. I hope you guys keep reading :)

    ReplyDelete

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