My latest book is The One Who Swam With The Fishes.

"A mesmerizing account of the well-known story of Matsyagandha ... and her transformation from fisherman’s daughter to Satyavati, Santanu’s royal consort and the Mother/Progenitor of the Kuru clan." - Hindustan Times

"Themes of fate, morality and power overlay a subtle and essential feminism to make this lyrical book a must-read. If this is Madhavan’s first book in the Girls from the Mahabharata series, there is much to look forward to in the months to come." - Open Magazine

"A gleeful dollop of Blytonian magic ... Reddy Madhavan is also able to tackle some fairly sensitive subjects such as identity, the love of and karmic ties with parents, adoption, the first sexual encounter, loneliness, and my favourite, feminist rage." - Scroll

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19 August 2005

I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink, I'm sooooo tired, my mind is on the blink, I wonder should I get up and get myself a drink?

Since I am exhausted and very mindfucked and have been indulging in game-playing to a massive extent this past week, I can't put together a coherent post so instead I'm going to post about what I've been up to this past week, that has run me ragged so I have no creative energy left. Which is probably a good thing, because then, all that energy is going into my job, but also a bad thing, coz I don't have any extra. Think of this as the footnote, only in the beginning. (Yes, I know it has it's own term, I just don't remember what it is. I'm very, very zoned.)

So here's what has happened to me this week:

Monday, I made pages again at work, put the finishing touches on my blogging story and sent it off. Thank you, thank you to all the wonderful women who told me their stories. I wanted to put each email and conversation in, whole and unedited, but sadly, I couldn't. Space constraints and all. But after my story is printed (and no, I can't tell you when and I can't tell you where) I'll post all the emails here, if that's okay with the people who sent them in.

Tuesday, finally the longest week on desk ended. Each time I have to do it (we take it by turns) I think of it as the week that never ends. But this time I had even done one extra day and had begun desk week on a Saturday and ended it two weeks later, technically. I met Iggy for drinks at MBs and told her that she was famous on my blog. The rest of my college gang had met up on Monday, coz it was Independance Day and all, and had had long bitching sessions about this other chick--the "friend" who slept with K. like a month after we broke up. So I was brought up-to-date about what was happening and I listened with utmost glee. I always defend my sex staunchly when people say, "Oh you women just gossip" because we really, really don't do it more or less than men do. I've seen guys bitching like MAD and then being really sweet to the person they were bitching about.

I have my four or five closest friends and the rest, are, well, incidental. I like them all very much, that's why they're my friends in the first place, but, yeah, four or five people tops, know every nuance of my life, down to how I'm going to react in a situation. This one time, I remember, Iggy and I had gone out with one of her friends and I was showing him my lighter, where the flame turns from blue to green. He examined it for a while and said, "There's a copper wire here and when that burns it turns green." (Or something. I forget the exact scientific thing he said). So I grinned at him and said, "Oooh, dude, you're so scientific." and he said, "Okay, cut the sarcasm." And Iggy goes, "Um... she actually means it." And that made me quiet for a while, because, I had said it quite flippantly, even though I was seriously impressed that he knew that and I was amazed that she could tell. Friends are like the best invention, ever.

Wednesday, I met Anoushka Shankar and she's very nice and very pretty. She was wearing loads of blush-on and she's just released an album and dude, fuck, she's twenty four. My age. I also want to have released an album or two or three. *sulk* I have my Grammy speech all ready also. (I practice in the bathroom mirror with shower gel and sorta scoop my hair back with shampoo so it looks like I have a pompadour. Then I do a Britney Spears performance, usually Hit Me Baby, One More Time. Stop laughing.) Anyway, so we were packing up and the photographer tells me, "It's really cool that she's like so into classical music and stuff." "Yeah?" I said, coz, really, duh? "No, I mean, considering she used to be a hard core raver. I used to see her at all these parties." My jaw dropped and he grinned happily at me. Anyway, that's my Anoushka Shankar story.

That evening I went for a photography exhibition, but nothing really exciting happened there. Then I went to Priya's where we both moaned about how tired we were and she had just returned from Manali so she got me this really cool purple and white knit hairband. It looks odd now though, coz the ends of my hair stick out like some porcupine or something, but now that winter's coming, I'm thinking of growing my hair again. Which means that it's in the in-between stage now and every day is a bad hair day.

Then we went to TC where we also met Nitya, Hot Nineteen from last week, and a bunch of other people. We're frankly getting a little bored of TC now, *collective gasp* so next Wednesday we're going to Cafe Morrisson which has retro nights and free jive lessons every week. It sounds like fun, no? :)

Phew, finally, today I went to this new place for lunch, very hungover I might add. I was being slightly short with the lisping, very gay PR guy who latches on so I felt intense guilt when he said, "You know, you're such a warm person. And you're so nice. I feel like I can talk to you, not like other journos." I felt so bad, I was instantly very nice to him battling all my feelings of annoyance. I'm a terrible person. Food was good though.

After that, just when I thought I could go home and go to bed, I was sent for a book launch, Aitzaz Ahsan's, and the chief guest they got just wouldn't shut up. I don't know what it is with these people. It's like he didn't want to relinquish the limelight. He talked for like one hour and by the time the poor author got up again to ask if there were any questions, everyone was in a state of somnolence. And this old guy behind me kept belching. Why do old people think they can let go of gas wherever they want without a word of apology? These were long, loud belches too, the kind that sound like just before you're going to vomit.

Okay, that was my week so far. No wonder I'm tired.


  1. too much of anything can tire you ot, eM, even TC. So what's this Cafe Morrission place?

    (as you can see I am taking you role as guide to delhi nightlife seriously)

  2. If only my life was as interesting, I would love to get tired everyday!

  3. Retro and jive - sounds like just my kind of place. Definitely better than you all-time favourite, which I just detest.

  4. Yeah recently someone told me how they saw Anoushka Shankar in Goa tripping at some Rave party !!

    And Britney Spears ?? Seriously ??

  5. Anoushka is so godawfully overrated and a total pain to work with, I've been told.

    Heh, welcome to the 'bored-with-TC' club, once we went for as long as two months without dropping by, even now it is really the lack of another good place to go to that keeps us going there, otherwise I cringe everytime I think of making across the bonsai dance floor anytime past 11, it feels like the Delhi - Jaipur highway then.

  6. Trying to shake mental image of petite girl in bathrobe and pink towel wrapped around her head, singing to herself, shakin it.

    Brrrrrr !!

    In a wierd way, Im find myself in a very similar situation. I need to go and do something about it, else am probably going to burn out before pardy weekend in Madras. A quick recharger... hmmm..

  7. vague: :) See last post for your answer.

    sinusoidally: It IS fun, isn't it? I'm sure I'd love my job if I had the energy to!

    gypsynan: Okaaaaaay then :)

    gamesmaster: It does sound like fun, yes, but I hope it lives up to that. And you're forgetting that I CAN'T dance, so will in all likelihhod trip, land on my bottom and feel horrible.

    tama: Wanna switch? :)

    chamique: "Purged" is right. I can't tell you how much better I felt after I posted this.

    rat; Sometimes Britney Spears. Other times I do some great Broadway numbers just for variety. And ooh.. Must Have Been Love. Seriously, "but it's ooooooooover now" sounds SO good in the shower :)

    codey: You're telling ME. I attempted to dance there once or twice, but kept bumping into drinks and cigarettes and so I stopped.

    vignesh: Nothing works better as a recharger than a day in bed. Guess what my plans for Sunday are? ;)

  8. em: yes child, I am telling you, us are of serious vintage there... goes all the way back to 2001 and way too many drunken 'oops...we did all that crazy shit on THAT floor?' moments in between before the boredom set in.. ;-) but to its credit other than once we've never gotten into a fight there.. sigh.. too many good memories...

    but please to be checking the email id you've listed on the blog.. might just be able to use your help over something... thank ye..

  9. Nothing wrong with performing Britney Spears. A lot of very drunk people like to hear Britney Spears performed by people other than Britney Spears. Welcome to karaoke. Oh, and Roxette rules!

    And old people have to release their gas wherever they are. Otherwise they will spontaneously combust.

  10. Hello hello,
    you be coming to the Naresh Kapuria thing this evening?

  11. You liked Anoushka? When I interviewed her the next day I thought she was ok but not an attractive personality.

  12. err...was watching anoushka (speaking with a terrible californian accent) being interviewed by this lady on TV the other day. hmmmm....I wonder....hmmm

  13. Hey, have u seen today's HT? Kanika Gahlaut's story on women's blogs in India. You're all over it.
    Chick clicks, she calls it.

  14. codey: checked and answered to I think you'll find :)

    amandarama: The one thing Delhi lacks is a good Karoake bar. I've been looking and looking..

    mint: I know. And that's just at the THOUGHT of it. Imagine if you were there.

    ab: Well, I thought she was quite nice. Seemed intellegent also, and you forget the last singer I met was Hans Raj Hans, so... :)

    kaashyapeya: I'm with print journalism. :) So no Nancy Drew-ing for you :)

    sunshine woman: Hey thanks for the tip off, I went and looked. Hardly all over it though, but it explains why so many people are googling "the compulsive confessor" :)

  15. ummm...frank hardy might be a bit nearer the mark. the great one needs glasses, methinks. I don't mind the comparison, but the svelte Ms. Drew might. Though she was created by the same author under a different avatar.

  16. may be u should cut the page 3 crap and do some serious journalism :)


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