My latest book is The One Who Swam With The Fishes.

"A mesmerizing account of the well-known story of Matsyagandha ... and her transformation from fisherman’s daughter to Satyavati, Santanu’s royal consort and the Mother/Progenitor of the Kuru clan." - Hindustan Times

"Themes of fate, morality and power overlay a subtle and essential feminism to make this lyrical book a must-read. If this is Madhavan’s first book in the Girls from the Mahabharata series, there is much to look forward to in the months to come." - Open Magazine

"A gleeful dollop of Blytonian magic ... Reddy Madhavan is also able to tackle some fairly sensitive subjects such as identity, the love of and karmic ties with parents, adoption, the first sexual encounter, loneliness, and my favourite, feminist rage." - Scroll



Sign up for my newsletter: The Internet Personified

22 December 2006

www.selfobsessed.com

> So, the nose story. Also known as the dude-why-are-you-not-drinking story. Anyway, so whilst (I love the word whilst, I could use it everywhere. Say it with me: whilssssssst, WHilst, whIlst. See how flexible?) I was in Bali (which is a sentence most of my friends are sick of by now, but aha! ahahaha! I have cunningly fooled them by handing them a matchbox from the hotel I was staying in, so all they can do is roll their eyes, because technically, I'm not saying whilst I was in Bali) I got very drunk one night on champagne and margaritas (note to people who have not mixed champagne with anything: DON'T) and so I went to wash my face, to sober up, I think, and as I was wiping my face, my piercing got stuck in a towel and yanked downwards. At the moment, I was too drunk to care, but the next morning I woke up with a) a mouthful of fur; b) a splitting headache and c) a nose that I couldn't even touch. Big deal, I said, pish posh, it's only a nose, it'll heal, so I let it be for some time . All through my birthday party, I was all lalalalala, and no, don't mind my nose, it's just a little sore. And then people kept hugging me and I'm not very tall, you should know, so I'm usually squashed into their chests, and when one friend did that, I screamed, and this just kept happening till it was all raw and red and pus encrusted. I know right? I really don't want to be telling this story, it hurts me more than it hurts you. Not only that, it healed in the middle, so you have the original piercing hole, pink healed skin and um, my nosering. So, since even touching it made me want to pass out, reluctantly I went to the doctor. And she put me on antibiotics, twice a day, not to mention an anti-inflammatory pill and a foul smelling cream and VITAMINS! (I always feel the need to capitalise VITAMINS, just because they're such capital things, ya know?)

Older readers will recall, this is not the first time I have been hurt in the line of duty. I broke my toe and walked into a glass door. Dangerous business, journalism.

> There's a dhabha next to my office, famous for its kebabs, and today I ordered a plate of chicken tikka and two naans. Except, the oil from the tikkas has now dripped all over my keyboard, despite many swipes with a napkin and my keyboard is all sticky. Ew. Worst of all, it's taken out the 'i' button, the one I use most as you can see, so the tip of my forefinger that I'm using to tentatively swipe at it is also sticky. Time for some more obsessive hand washing, I think.

> Blogging people have been met, one by freakish coincidence, because Small had a friend in town who turned out to be her family friend and all of them came back to our house to chill and I recognised her name I think and we did the whole ooh-this-world-is-so-small squeal. (Well, I squealed. She's much too dignified to squeal) So hello, Surly Girl and it was nice meeting you. The second was actually someone I had never met in "real life" though since I know Hobo and the two of them were friends and I read his blog, and we chatted on MSN occassionally, it seemed only natural that we should hang out whilst (muahahahaha) he was in Delhi. And we've been having fun, haven't we, Zaphod? Oh, and because I have no life, I also emailed this other girl whose blog I read, and that's been a fun correspondence too. Hasn't it? HASN'T IT? What would my life be without the internet? A lonely, lonely place, that's what.

> And today Shark Tooth sent me an email with our address on it, and directions on how to get there, and that was very nice. Only, he'll be working once I land, so in all likelihood I will have to find him to collect the keys and officially move in.

~Sticky fingered eM signing out.
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14 comments:

  1. ouch much! sorry bout the shnoz! hope it feels better...
    and it is indeed a ridiculously small world sometimes.
    cheers...

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  2. Hope your nose is better...

    Do tell me, when one finally meets a fellow blogger (the ones whose blogs you read), are they along the lines of what you expected ?

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  3. In my country, there's a saying about noses that are torn by yanked noserings: "Yyeeowwchchhhhhh!".

    Journalism, eh? One wants to follow thou in thy noble footsteps. One was wondering if thou might perhaps condescend, and deign to to talk to one. So one very humbly asks... wait, make that half, not even one (while being humble, might as well...)

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  4. the nose thingy sounds 'ouch'. it seems u brought up the topic only to mention (again) that u had been to bali. and how many matchboxes r u carryin? the hotels in bali are suddenly facing a scarcity of matchboxes!

    The girl at the desk behind me has got a big red scratch on her nose as well... i wonder if the world has shrunk so much that she cud be u. naah! far-fetched, isn't it?

    talking abt meeting fellow bloggers, i had strange coincidence earlier this year when i bumped into a fellow digi-artist with whom I had been sharing notes on deviatart. it felt nice.

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  5. hi lil eM. The nose will heal but YUCK!!!!! you ate naan and chicken tikka's for lunch?!?! Just naan and tikkas?!?!? Meat and maida?!?!? The nose will heal lil eM but your tummy never will. hope you improve your eating habits in Mumbai lil eM.

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  6. Ugh. Still cringing about the nose thingy. Hope it is better, what with the vitamins and all...

    When are you washing up in the shores of Mumbai?

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  7. Ouch about the nose. THAT'S why none of my 5 piercings are in my nose.

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  8. dude: thanks, thanks. it feels better now though, and yeah, "small world" is exactly how you and i met also! when're you back again? before i leave, i hope.

    jay sun: well, sometimes. and sometimes not. but there's always a certain comfort level, like you've gone past the polite conversation stage and get right to the good stuff.

    witnwisdumb: i'd be happy to give you whatever information you need, email me. :)

    bricks: well, you could say "compulsive confessor" really loudly and if she visibly reacts, then yeah, it's probably me. actually, probably not! :)

    anon, who is actually not so anon because i know who you are: a) STOP with the "little"!! b) it was a perfectly lovely lunch and c) you're just jealous coz i'm younger and can therefore digest more things.

    rohini: it feels much better today, thanks. and also, because of the non-drinking, i feel all detoxified. :) 10 days to go!! i can't tell whether i'm excited or terrified.

    mint: let me guess: ears and navel? :)

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  9. hahahaha your phone call & email were both highly entertaining esp. since I was also a bit drunk and you told me off for bring an unnecessarily judgmental bitch. [its troo too]

    Your nose ring sounds damn bad, my teeth are in the same situation. I thought it would be all good but apparently I'm now a borderline root canal case. Yieks!

    I feel so cheated by the dentists they never told me this could happen it always seemed like a distant painful thing that couldn't possibly happen to me ever :(

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  10. How is my Benny? What did he have to say? I miss you folks too. We must skype before you move to Mumbai and then are etherless for a while. :) It's been a while. Why is Iggy so hard to contact? And Bouncy so easy? Hahahaha.............She'll be reading this fo shizzle! I spoke to Peices for an hour and half the other day. Oh the joy! She knows the only reason why I'll move to Mumbai is her. Who gives a rat's arse about a career? So maybe March. Not like I don't love you either. You read the post.

    And to remedy this disinformation campaign started by you on my blog, you are in no concievable way the sanest of the lot. I hate to burst your bubble darling but you too are a Mad Raging Lunatic, the loniest of them all. No wait! There's always Iggy.

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  11. scritch: i never said judgemental bitch!!! :) you wound me. sympathies about the root canal. i had braces for five years and several extractions and tightenings and ew, dentists. why would anyone WANT a job like that?

    hobo: haaaw. how mean. you'd move to mumbai for pieces and not me? hmph. go away. (but also? yay! march!! email me all the details!!)

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  12. eM: I have not been THIS SHOCKED in a long time. Did you say I was dignified???????????????!!!!!!

    [I really am shocked, I never use punctuation marks ad infinitum, but this dignified business calls for it]

    Glad you're enjoying Bombay. When you meet Leo next, give him a whack for me. Also, you are more than welcome to come with him to Sydney in the second half of March and stay at my place.

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