My latest book is The One Who Swam With The Fishes.

"A mesmerizing account of the well-known story of Matsyagandha ... and her transformation from fisherman’s daughter to Satyavati, Santanu’s royal consort and the Mother/Progenitor of the Kuru clan." - Hindustan Times

"Themes of fate, morality and power overlay a subtle and essential feminism to make this lyrical book a must-read. If this is Madhavan’s first book in the Girls from the Mahabharata series, there is much to look forward to in the months to come." - Open Magazine

"A gleeful dollop of Blytonian magic ... Reddy Madhavan is also able to tackle some fairly sensitive subjects such as identity, the love of and karmic ties with parents, adoption, the first sexual encounter, loneliness, and my favourite, feminist rage." - Scroll



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1 March 2011

None shall sleep

Ahhhh, what a fabulous time I’ve been having. Now I’m finally back in Delhi after a brilliant, brilliant time at the beach and my various travel escapades, and Delhi has the early springtime glow about it, even though I still have my heater on, because I’m a wuss about the cold, clearly. But the feeling of well being persists, and all is well in my world.

 

And all this activity and not a thing to blog about. This is the problem with well being, generally, it leaves you with a profound lack of drama.

 

I would’ve been getting married last week. The dates we fixed on were the 22nd to the 24th. The 22nd was the dinner plus mehendi thing, the 23rd was the wedding and the 24th, the reception. It would have been a good wedding too, but the marriage? Probably not. It’s funny the things you learn in retrospect.

 

And the other funny thing about going on a beach holiday by yourself? Sitting there, watching the waves, the occasional falling star in a sky scattered with them, I released JC out of my system for once and for all. He’s gone now, leaving only the faintest echo, which should fade away soon.

 

So, now, I am truly single. Not even the ghosts of ex-boyfriends to keep me company. I am all alone, at last, and it’s not as lonely as you think it’s going to be. At other times, it’s every bit as lonely.

 

But I’m on my own now, baby.

14 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. :o) Good for you. new leaf, new life.

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  3. I'm a great believer in letting go, very empowering, that!

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  4. I am impressed. You actually managed to let go? I have been moping over a relationship that lasted 2 months, for the last half a year. And I still cant say I have let go. I still cant listen to old love songs or read mills and boons without memories popping up. Pathetic I know.

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  5. Remember this one?

    "Top four things that made me realise I am finally over K.

    4) I am more jealous of the fact that he has an iPod than I am over the fact that he might be sleeping with girls who are prettier than me."

    Oh, the ability to laugh at ourselves ... laugh at our own dramas. :o))

    Isn't it weird how the world makes us feel pressured to say things like, "I'm over you." and "I'm fine. Don't worry about me." and "I've moved on." Every time I say something like that, trying to sound confident, independent and indifferent, there's a little part of me wondering if it's really true. At the end of the day, there's no new boyfriend or kids running around for me to show as proof. But hey, at least the occasional sadness proves we're actually human beings with hearts capable of feeling.

    Your holiday sounds awesome! And well deserved! :o))

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  7. our lives r v similar...:)

    i gt into a relationship when u did,,,,and v brk up at the same time :)

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  8. Letting go and getting over must come naturally, which happens with time. At the same time the feeling of losing even when in a non committal equation can be scary! Bizzare!

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  9. Lucky bum. Looks like I should take one such vacation and let go ALREADY. It's been too long. Sigh. Good for you though.

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