My latest book is The One Who Swam With The Fishes.

"A mesmerizing account of the well-known story of Matsyagandha ... and her transformation from fisherman’s daughter to Satyavati, Santanu’s royal consort and the Mother/Progenitor of the Kuru clan." - Hindustan Times

"Themes of fate, morality and power overlay a subtle and essential feminism to make this lyrical book a must-read. If this is Madhavan’s first book in the Girls from the Mahabharata series, there is much to look forward to in the months to come." - Open Magazine

"A gleeful dollop of Blytonian magic ... Reddy Madhavan is also able to tackle some fairly sensitive subjects such as identity, the love of and karmic ties with parents, adoption, the first sexual encounter, loneliness, and my favourite, feminist rage." - Scroll



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6 December 2007

I'm Like Vasco Da Gama, Except With Prettier Shoes

I know, I know, it's been a while. But nothing of massive consequence happened to me recently. And I've had a horrible, old woman, hacking, tuberculosis type cough. (I'll do it for you: yes, yes, smoke some more). Actually, I still have the cough, I need to go to a doctor and stop being so damn lazy about it. But! I have made new discoveries!

> DISCOVERY ONE: My cat is fucking adorable. He is. His new trick is to sit on top of the TV when it's on. But then he sees all these people inside this little box as he's lying sprawled there, and you can see the tip of his tail beginning to twitch as he pulls himself into sitting position and gazes upside down at the TV. By this time, I'm beginning to giggle, so when he plonks down on his stomach and makes grabs at the yummy Owen Wilson, I'm hysterical. Which is when he notices me, and is all like, "Whatchoo laughing at, woman?" Then, he will turn his back to me and the TV and the world in general and wash himself thoroughly and indignantly. This is point normally when I grab him and say, "Whoosh my handsome? Whoosh?" into his ear. He suffers this if we're alone, even purring a little, but if there's anyone else in the room, he looks at me all stricken and "Mo-oooooooom, please." and then scampers off. I love mindfucking with my cat. What else are small furry dependant creatures for but to sneak up and pat them on their bottoms as they stalk flies, thereby making them jump a mile in the air? Heh.

> DISCOVERY TWO: Okay, so I have an addictive personality. So far, my addictions are: coffee, cigarettes, potatoes, cell phones, the internet and lifestyle. This is why I don't do chemicals (besides the fact that they can completely blast out a few hundred brain cells), because I'm afraid that I might get all coke-head-y. (Also drugs are bad. Sorry, this is a particular pet peeve. And don't give me the whole oh-alcohol-is-a-drug schpeil. Face it, alcohol is legal for a reason and MDMA just isn't. And before you ask, nope, not an alcoholic, yet. That seems to be the one addiction I've been exposed to that I haven't grabbed on to.) Anyhoo, so recently I discovered the ENTIRE Babysitter's Club collection online. OMG. Hardly daring to believe my eyes I clicked a link and there they all were and it was Claudia with her funky clothes and Stacey who was diabetic and really a big city girl and also a trendy dresser and Dawn who had super long, super pale hair and was from California and liked health food and Mary Anne who was shy and cried a lot but had a very cute boyfriend and Kristy who had this billionaire stepfather and who I always suspected was gay and Mallory who had seven brothers and sisters and Jessi who was black and a ballet dancer. I felt like I had died and gone to heaven. And I've been just reading them and reading them. Like chocolate or something. I can't bring myself to stop. Last night I was reading till THREE in the MORNING. I'm doomed. (Go to scribd.com and do a search for babysitter's club.)

> DISCOVERY THREE: So, I have two new flatmates, starting next month. Both girls, both from the old alma mater. It's nice that I sorta know them, because then I'm not sharing with absolute strangers. It's nice that I don't know them THAT well, because sometimes even the nicest friends can turn into absolute psychos when they become your roommate. I need to give these two pseudonyms though. What to call them? They're both tall--well, taller than me--so that won't work. Should I just give them random names? I think so. Okay, so the Compulsive household now includes eM, tc, Yamini and Lali. I'll miss Shark Tooth, but despite my best efforts, he's determined to move, so I'm glad at least his replacements are nice. And organised. And everyone leaves for work at different times so no bathroom issues, before you ask. I have SO much to do though, before they move in and he moves out, including changing the names on the lease and changing the address on my SIM card which is on Shark Tooth's name now.

> DISCOVERY FOUR: I have crow's feet! At the young and tender age of almost-26! This SUCKS. I refuse to be old. I don't WANT to turn 26. I'm having an aging meltdown. The party, which I've planned for next weekend (my birthday's on a Thursday) is going to have a kid's theme, as in, I've told everyone to dress as they would in 1987, I'm going to have games like Pin The Tail On The Donkey and Passing The Parcel and Three Legged Races and so on. It'll be just like being six again except with alcohol. Lots of alcohol. On second thought, this adulthood thing isn't bad at all.

24 comments:

  1. Which one's Yamini, which Lalli? (Asks the soon to be ex flatmate of, I'm guessing, Lalli.) As heard only in amchi, Good luck "all of y'all"!

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  2. lol...i do the same thing to my cat.
    "whooj my baby?" and "whooj my hanshum hunk?"
    and i give him names like "haseena", so when 'hassena' is sleepy, i call him "chheepy chheena"
    yea yea, "sleepy haseena"

    i have too many 'my cat and i' stories.
    :)
    he's super spoilt bcause he has arthirits in one elbow joint and ended up losing his eyesight as a side effect.

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  3. no offence!

    but cat with arthiritis! now i can die :)!

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  4. Eighties theme party? You should play "Seven Minutes in Heaven" like in that Jennifer Garner movie, 13 Going On 30...

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  5. i always thought u'd have an adorable 'cat'
    lol. sorry couldn't resist that one. ;)

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  6. After wondering for ages why I’m subscribing to that Sunday supplement (which one reads in the morning-after haze and then dozes off, only to forget some of the best bits when I wake up later) instead of just buying it at Crepe Station later, if one’s up to it…I finally remember to put the sheet with the article (which must be familiar enough to you by now to be called just “the articleJ) under my pillow for later devouring..

    Am glad I did.

    Especially that pre-historic post about a certain library with tall wooden shelves, where I remember discovering probably the nicest thing that ever happened to sarcasm, also called Wodehouse… In the frenetic need to keep a bit of the magic with me beyond the summer break, I remember borrowing, a lil permanently, a moth eaten copy of “Aunts aren’t Gentlemen”, which adorns my old steel trunk to date…. (You ain’t the snitching kinds..are youJ)

    Wrote this three days back. Managing to send today. I think the Saturday-from-hell-followed-by-sadness thingie is catching..

    Adios !

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  7. Em,RUM is best for cough..take one peg rum and pour hot water and put Pepper...nxt day it wlll go twrds ur back routes...and also wll get strng on ur Back routes....Do u think 2 celbrate ur Bthday?.....How with Ckes or Hot Cakes?....whtever invite me...because we r with u...ur...ur Smells....do not avoid,we will get Smells...

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  8. Crows feet mean, you laugh a lot and thats a good thing :)

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  9. Oh i remember the babysitters club! Didn't they have a tv series as well?

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  10. Ah! I have a pile of Baby Sitters Club books in my garage...such joy they were!

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  11. Thankie girl, for the babysitter's club link...
    Had it not been for the Mail Today article, I wouldn have come across this. (Though the article said something like 'blogs r the only reason why blondes are not considered dumb anymore'; you know an age old, yawnable sexist observation. For the babysitter's thingie, it is forgivable.)
    Now I'm going back to my tehheheeeing, as I have to finish off the other posts you wrote. :D

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  12. Ooh, make sure you get hats and balloons. Else, it's no fun.

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  13. really? don't think so.

    you're more like a cheap tabloid, except with prettier words.

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  14. haha, petting a cat as its about to jump on prey? priceless! :))))

    but i like the idea of a kids theme party. the alcohol can only make it better. woohoo, you HAVE to post about how it goes!

    and I heard you (wrote? are writing?) a book! whats it on? :)

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  15. just one ques: how can u afford all this?

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  16. pleasse post link for babysitters club collection, thanks

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  17. ohh baby sitters club!high school flashback!saturday nights spent alone at home reading 3 in one night!not much has changed unfortunately *sighs* n the Katy books! I LOVED those!(from your lil library thing on the side)Just discovered this blog. Perfect lazy sunday morning readin:D

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  18. they've removed all the BSC books from that link i think...wasn't able to find any this morning...damn...

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  19. Hot Whisky- the one the Irish invited right! That is THE ONLY way to get rid of a cold...

    honey
    cloves
    lemon
    whisky
    hot water

    yummm!

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  20. i just wish people who leave snide remarks and comments have the balls to do it with their name..... too afraid of being socked in the same place that they dont have what they need i guess!!

    pretty shoed vasco da gama...... explore on!!

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  21. hi i started reading ur blog and its very interesting. just have a look at my blog
    http://www.mirrorboy2008.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete

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